I am not going to lie...we are a traditional values-God fearing - people loving family. So the ruling was not one received with joy and excitement. I do not subscribe to the idea of hate and never intentionally do so (but God has been known to set me straight a few times). Those that know me understand my tendency to share my mind and offer my point of view so you would think I would have been busy last week spreading my point of view. Well I said nothing! I posted nothing! I only shared my heart with a few close friends. I sat back and watched the blasts being shot from both sides and sighed.
I spent time thinking about what did this mean for me and my family. How do I explain this to my kids? How do we respond to the possible invite to a friend's marriage ceremony? How do I respond when asked my opinion on the topic? How was I supposed to represent Christ's love through this shift in society?
Now don't stop reading just yet...stay with me. I promise no matter what side of this issue you stand you can appreciate my words.
First, I must stand on the truths of God and be clear that I believe that marriage is intended to be between one man and one women for eternity.
So I cannot accept the ruling of the Court and we as a family do not look to our government to define truth.
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. Genesis 2:24
Teach me your way, O Lord, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name. Psalm 86:11So what will I do?
I will defend the sanctity of marriage by ensuring I am defending the sanctity of MY marriage. I will live in a way that my marriage is set apart just as God has called Christians to be set apart. So what do I mean?
When John and I first met, I refused to date him and our relationship consisted of late night phone calls into the early morning hours and his insistent annoyance of me. He became my best friend (and still is today). I am not joking when I tell you that when we decided we wanted to move forward with our relationship I had a set of rules. Seemingly silly and overbearing but it was my way of expressing my heart's desire for my husband. John agreed and off to the chapel we went!
Those rules (even though I made them for selfish reasons) actually outlined how I needed John to love me. Pure. Holy. Not to be confused with the lustful love but one of steadfast love that would stand the test of time. (Side Note: I was far from perfect or holy. Looking back now I know my actions and attitudes grieved God. Yet something within me was calling out for something better in my life. But more on that in a future blog.)
So to defend marriage, I will battle against the the enemy as he attempts to attack my marriage. I will guard against infidelity, bitterness, jealousy, selfishness, and various other sinful behaviors that can destroy my marriage. I will lovingly forgive my husband and accept him as the man God chose to be my husband. I will not compare him to others. I will not subject myself to movies, books, or TV that would have me look to another instead of my husband. And most importantly I will continue to seek God for guidance in my marriage.
You see for me to stand up and defend the sanctity of marriage, I must do so on all fronts and not just those areas I pick and choose. So as John and I are Growing Up on Dublin Lane we will continue to fight for our marriage and defend the covenant we entered 16 years ago.