What I Gave Up

When we decided we were ready to make the leap of faith and have me resign my job in the world to focus more energy and time with family,  my husband and I made our list of things we would be giving up as we adjusted our budget.  Here are a few we knew...

1.  Dining out for meals.  No I am not referring to the date night or occasional family night out would be eliminated.  I am talking about the Morris schedule of eating out like 4 times a week & we usually had leftovers (from our dining out) a couple of other nights.  Just to remind you there are only 7 days in the week. With my hectic work schedule and the kids activities, being home just wasn't an option so we were well known at local restaurants.  So much so that our favorite waitstaff would ask how the kids were doing!  

2.  Wal-Mart shopping sprees.  You giggle but you know what I am talking about.  Those quick trips to the store for an item and walking out with a buggy-full of CRAP and a couple of hundred dollars gone.

3.  Hobby Lobby.  I LOVE this store.  I would spend hours roaming the store, planning my next project, & purchasing all the necessary items.  I ended up with some really great stuff.  I mean I could make some totally Pinterest worthy projects.  Just one small problem......MY stuff  never made it to a finished project status.  

I thought I was prepared for the transition.  I mean we made our list, right?  We thought through everything we needed to adjust, eliminate, or alter.  I had this ALL figured out.  I mean what else would I need to give up?  But what happened I could not have planned.  I began to give up a few more things...

Anxiety.  No longer do I feel the pressure to perform or felt pushed to compete with others.  Well on most days. I was able to lay my stress and worry before God.  

Cast all your anxiety on him because he care for you.  1 Peter 5:7

Fear.  I was not fearful of tomorrow.  How would my life end up?  Would we get that big house we always dreamed of?  Would we have place in the country for the kids to run free?  I am beginning to LIVE my life right where I am.  A life pleasing & honoring to God.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.  John 14:27

Loneliness.  Due to the position I held, I carried the weight of decisions and expectations on my shoulders.  I created a wall to keep myself separate.  And lonely.  Never feeling transparent and REAL with others.  I now enjoy friendships.  True friendships.  Able to freely share my own struggles and inadequacies.  Able to ask for prayers and encouragement.  God has brought wonderful friends into my life to support and encourage me with my walk with the Lord.

And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.  Matthew 28.20

Inadequacy. Guilt. Shame.  Juggling work, home, family, and church I never felt I had enough to give.  To anyone.  Always forgetting this event or that event.  Forgetting the laundry resulting in picking out the "least dirty" items from the laundry to outfit the family in for the next day.  I am able to BREATHE.  Now my household is still a frenzy ...I mean we are still a family of 7 all living under one roof with everyone going all directions.  BUT I now make quiet time with God and spending time studying the Bible a priority. This has made a huge difference in my life.

Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life.  John 5:24 

Now I don't want to paint the picture that all is well in the Morris Manor.  I still forget laundry but dryer sheets do wonders!  I do worry that I will be the single reason that my children will need counseling as adults.  But I know that my God is bigger than anything I may face in this world. 

And greater is the One living inside of me  Than he who is living in the world     -Mercy Me  "Greater" 

  And that is what Growing Up on Dublin Lane is all about.