Go!

Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples.  Psalm 96:3

A passion of mine has always been missions.  Before kids Hunky Hubby and I were able to take several trips mission trips.  We loved being in the middle of a foreign land, with the locals, and working alongside missionaries and the local people on a project.

I was able to experience an amazing trip to Africa.  This a step of faith for us.  We had 3 kiddos at home and our newest addition was to be born just days before I left.  Well that didn't go as planned so I boarded a plan to fly halfway across the world knowing that my daughter would enter the world just days later.  One of the toughest decisions ever.  The only one I could be there from the first breath.  The only one that I could experience holding her and seeing her within minutes of being born.  I still am not sure how I was able to get on that plane.  But my strength is nothing compared to the idea of Hunky Hubby home with all the kiddos......managing a 12 year old, two 4 year olds, a 6 month old and a newborn!!!  Now granted he doesn't remember much of that week but everyone survived!

As an immature believer, I found the idea of "doing" God's work in a foreign land exciting.  Much more exciting than my boring work at home.  It was as if I thought less of the place God had me than of those in foreign missions.  I can still remember the exhilaration of the adventure and how I would return on fire for the Lord.  You know that feeling.  It is the same feeling you may have had after returning from youth camp.   Only problem with that feeling is it usually is short-lived.

I was guilty of thinking "that place" was a better place.  Oh look at what God is doing "over there".  Man why can't I have THAT ministry.

I know what you are thinking.  How UNGRATEFUL!  And you know what you are right.  I wasn't grateful.  I didn't recognize the amazing "mission" God had given me. We were licensed foster parents.  We were opening our homes to children in need of love.  We were living in a community (not very different than every community in the world) that needed to see what love truly was.  And I missed it.  I didn't see it.  I was too smitten with the idea of "doing God's work" that I missed out on DOING God's work.

How many times do we all get caught up in this thinking?  Too busy admiring others around us that we fail to see God's plan for our lives.  Too busy keeping up with the __________ (insert whoever!) we don't see how to impact our small part of the world.  Too busy day dreaming of running a huge faith based initiative that we forget to take that first step out our door.

That was me!  I felt such a yearning to do more.  To be more.  To do something. That I basically did nothing........ but dream. Stunted by the desire to be and do more that I did nothing.

As I searched for that "mission field" I so desperately wanted, I dived into scripture and tried to figure out what I was doing wrong.  I mean it had to be me right.  I mean why else would the God of the universe not be giving me what I wanted.  I mean it was biblical wasn't it.  I didn't want anything selfish....just the most amazing opportunity to satisfy me.

I am thankful for this time I spent yearning for more.  I can look back now and see how God has used this desire to draw me in closer to him.  My eyes were opened.  My heart was opened.  I was open.

So you already know, I don't have a world famous ministry.  We haven't sold all our possessions and moved to a far away land.  But God has given me a family of 7 that I am responsible to teach and show him the Lord's commandments.  God has placed us in a community where we can spend time with youth to develop relationships and share about Christ.  He gave me just what I needed to further HIS kingdom not my name....not my desires....not my wishes.....HIS KINGDOM!

Now I still love missions.  By God's provision earlier this year, a mission trip was possible with two of my daughters.  It was a wonderful opportunity to show the girls God's work in another part of the world.  I didn't go with the stars in my eyes like before.  I went humbled that God chose us to be a part of the bigger picture.  I came home grateful for the experience but ready to settle back into my "mission field".

By God's provision we hope to be able to take another trip in 2015.  Please say a prayer for us!  We still cannot see where or how this trip will happen but one thing we do know is that God can and will provide a way if he so chooses.   It isn't just about what I want is one more thing I am learning Growing Up on Dublin Lane.


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